Cro-mazing

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I tend to be skeptical of anything that’s over-hyped.  I’m even more averse to waiting on line for the privilege of buying a product or service. With that being said, I can tell you, without a doubt: The cronut lives up to the hype.

Simply put, it’s one of the best pastries I’ve had the pleasure of shoving in my face-hole. Eating one is an oral foray across layer upon later of flaky-yet-tender deliciousness.  A plain cronut would be wonderful on its own, but the pastry renaissance man that is Dominique Ansel gives this carbohydrate Bugatti a monthly roundhouse kick to the face with inventive flavors that prevent the cronut craze from getting old.

Just to clarify- I still don’t wait on line for them.  My friends and I do our damndest to pre-order them from the website,  which happens every Monday at 11AM.  To say that the cronuts sell out quickly would be an understatement.  They sell out faster than Aerosmith shows did in the 90’s.  Monday mornings involve multiple browsers being open on multiple devices, alot of refreshing, and even more cussing out loud.  My friend Adam, a talented mobile game developer, went all lL3t H4XX0R on us and set up a proxy server that was physically next to their hosting servers.  Thanks to him, We acquired half a dozen cronuts on two occasions.

Round one was a fairly classy affair. We trekked to Adam’s Jersey City enclave and pre-gamed our dinner with cronuts and sparkling wine.  The flavor: Raspberry and Lychee.

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The lychee ganache was a beguiling compliment to the raspberry compote, hiding between crispy/flaky/tender layers of dough.  The sparkling wine pairing took it to the next level.  Good times, and a great pre-game for dinner.

Round 2 occurred a few weeks later, at my place. The lady and I made the pickup at the bakery, and ended up eating a fat kid’s amount of pastries while we were there picking up the cronuts.  Upon getting home with the goods, we gazed upon the new flavor:  Milk and honey with Lavender:

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This cronut was not as flamboyant as the previous round of cronuts, but it was wonderful nonetheless.  The honey and cream were gently accompanied by lavender, which added an extra dimension to the flavor profile of the pastry.

We encountered a quandry upon getting together to eat the cronuts:  half of our friends hadn’t shown up, which means we had extra cronuts with nowhere to go! It was pretty much the living epitome of “First world problems.” We were obviously going to eat them, but I was looking to kick things up a notch.  Cue the bacon:

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Yup, that happened.  Meet the cronut bacon sammy. The addition of the porcine pleasure strips vaults the baked good firmly into salty/sweet territory. It’s a thing of simulatenous beauty and blasphemy.  I highly recommend you try it out if you’re into that sort of thing. I can assure you, it’s worth waiting on line for.

bacon cronut

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